As a parent, you understand that your children’s academic performance is one of the biggest determining factors of their future. But what happens if your child has a hard time prioritizing their grades? Motivating children to work hard in school (especially when they don’t want to) is a common struggle among many parents. Luckily, there are numerous things you can do to boost your child’s motivation. But which should you choose? We’ve narrowed down the five most effective strategies to boost your child’s motivation: Tip #1: Praise Your Child’s Effort When praising or congratulating their child, parents frequently focus on the outcome of a task and credit it to the child’s intelligence through comments like, “you’re so smart!” Although praising the outcome or natural intelligence feels normal, studies have shown that perhaps focusing on such factors isn’t the best way to motivate children to perform better in school. Reinforcing natural intelligence can cause children to blame their failures on their lack of ability, not their lack of effort. Blaming their own lack of ability demotivates children because natural ability isn’t within their control. Instead, focusing on the effort children put into their task can help them realize that their success is within their control. Furthermore, rewarding children for good grades that come easily can result in students not feeling like they need to put in effort or hard work. So not only can focusing on childrens’ efforts motivate them to succeed, but it also builds their confidence and teaches them to not be discouraged by failure.
So what can we do? It’ll be hard, but try to recondition normative phrases such as “That’s a really good grade, you must be really smart!” to “That’s a really good grade, you must have worked really hard!” Fostering in them a growth-mindset can not only motivate your child to perform better in school but also in all endeavors. In a separate article linked here, we’ve delved deeper into the importance of praising effort. Tip #2: Understand, Listen, and Communicate Depending on the child, the reasons for their lack of motivation could vary drastically. These complexities can be difficult for a child to communicate, so try to encourage transparency. Communication can lead to understanding your child’s needs. By listening to and validating the factors that contribute to their lack of motivation, you can act according to their unique situation.
As an extension of Tip #1, communicating stories of hard work over gifted intelligence can also be a way to motivate your child. Try to avoid sharing stories about the accomplished and gifted genius. Instead, try sharing stories about the person who fell in love with their work and/or worked extremely hard for their accomplishments. Try to share personal stories that resonate with and validate your child’s struggles. Establishing this connection could be a great first step to developing your child’s motivation for academic success.
Tip #3: Build Structure As a parent, one of the most influential ways you can help your child is by establishing structure in your household. One way you can establish structure is by fostering effective expectations. Try challenging your child to set their own expectations, such as “no video games until I am finished with homework”. Setting expectations can motivate children to complete their tasks and help them prioritize their responsibilities. By creating their own rule, your child is more likely to follow it! Then repeat the task until it builds into a routine. Trying to help your child build their ideal study routine to reduce the friction it takes for your child to complete the prioritized work. Removing as many distractions as possible will help your child focus as well!
Helping and teaching your child to organize and manage their life is another great way for them to develop structure because it helps them process information. Often times, the amount of information children have to process—knowledge, books, papers, pdfs, and more—can become overwhelming. For the physical, you can help them develop a binder system. For the digital, perhaps teach them how to make folders and organize documents. For tasks, teach them how to break down large tasks into smaller tasks. For knowledge, teach them how to simplify information.
“Building structure” sounds vague, but to condense the tip into a single theory, it’s really to incentivize your child and reduce friction for them to instill good habits!
Tip #4: Get Them Interested
Interest is a powerful motivator, and sometimes students don’t enjoy the process of learning a particular topic through school. You’re probably wondering, “Isn’t this the school’s job?” Sure, but sometimes students are simply more receptive to other approaches. Luckily, you can help! Your child doesn’t like history? Take them to visit an interesting historical site! They don’t like science? Enroll them on a science field trip! Of course, the activity would be most effective if tailored to your child’s qualities. For example, your child doesn’t like math, but they love to compete? Try a math competition! There are many forms of education outside of school that you can take advantage of to get your child interested in a subject they struggle with. By helping them become interested, your child will become motivated to learn more about it, which will translate into their academic performance.
Tip #5: Get a Tutor
It’s rare for teachers to be able to accommodate the needs of every student in their classroom, and this could also lead to a lack of motivation. Since tutors are one-on-one, they can tailor their teaching to your child’s specific needs. By teaching your child on an individual basis, they can adapt their teaching to make your child interested in a topic they otherwise wouldn’t be in school. Children often crave attention, so giving them individualized, academic attention by hiring a tutor could be a solution to motivating your child to take their education more seriously.
About the Author:
Allan Han, MA is a writer and educator with over six years of teaching experience in teaching K-12 students fundamental English, fundamental Math, SAT writing, and high school literature. He received his Master's Degree in English Instruction at NYU and formerly taught in LaGuardia High School in the city of New York.
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